Q: I’ve been faithfully reading your column in the Chicago Reader for years, and now I’m reaching out to you about my own problem. I’ve been dating this guy for almost a year. Everything is great, except one thing: He wants me to kick him in the nuts. It really bothers me, and I’m not sure what to do. He’s very serious about it, and he brings it up every single day. It makes me really uncomfortable that this is some sort of fetish of his and I need help taking steps forward. —To Kick or Not to Kick
Q: My husband and I were married in Toronto, Canada, in 2005, before marriage equality came to the United States. Does the U.S. government recognize our Canadian marriage or do we need to remarry in the U.S.? Can you find out from one of your legal friends? —Does Our Marriage Apply?
Q: I’m in a six-year relationship with a guy you will probably deem DTMFA-worthy but I deem round-up-able to the One. My kids already regarded him as their stepdad before we moved in together about eight months ago. That’s when I learned he’s an addict: He drinks, smokes weed, and jerks off to porn for about two hours every day. He has been this way for more than 20 years, and I have zero delusions he will change for me. Recently he told me he has very little sexual desire for me, that he knows my pussy in and out and it’s boring, but he loves my companionship. How do I deal with this so we can move forward together as an incompatible couple? —Sex Addict Partner
A: A 15-year-old girl may giggle the first time she gets French-kissed under the bleachers—or she may not—but a girl who giggles the first time probably isn’t going to be giggling the 50th. So just keep at it, try to relax and enjoy yourself, and ask your partner to take the lead, i.e., if you don’t know what to do, ask him to tell you what he’d like you to do, SKYPE—but only follow the orders you’re comfortable following.
Q: How much sex is too much sex? —Numb Over Numbers
