QMy wife and I went through a long-distance period when we were still dating and she went away to school. I used porn as a masturbatory aid during that time. I did not tell her this, as she believes that porn use is equivalent to cheating. Well, fast-forward a couple years (and a marriage), and I let it slip that I had watched some porn during the times we were apart. She flew off the handle, and ever since then insists that we can’t have children because I’m a pedophile for watching porn that may or may not have contained women acting like teenagers. She literally yells at me in public if my gaze goes anywhere near girls or women she perceives to be younger than she is. The same goes for watching TV, looking at magazines, you name it. A lot of this stems from her best friend’s cousin, who worked with people in the porn industry and seduced underage girls into sexual acts. To her, watching porn is the same as what this guy did, but I am pretty sure that I am not a sexual predator. I’ve never made any kind of sexual advance toward anyone else in the time I’ve been with her, and until my admission, she assumed I was a generally good person. At this point, I’m not sure how to get her to see me for the person I am rather than the person she thinks I’ve become. How do I convince her I am still the same person she fell in love with and get her to put aside this irrational fear she has about me? —Sincerely Not a Pedophile
Get out. Leave. Don’t look back. DTMFA.
AIf you go to BabyCenter.com and search “safe to ski while pregnant,” you’ll find a post that says, yeah, skiing is safe enough during the first two trimesters and highly unlikely to harm the fetus—barring a major accident. (Skiing is obviously a no-go during the third trimester.) Mary Lake Polan, chair emeritus of the department of gynecology and obstetrics at Stanford University School of Medicine, included this in her response to the skiing-while-pregnant question: “[The] baby is very well protected in the uterus—it usually takes a car accident or major trauma to harm the baby.”
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